This madness has got to stop!!
© J. Patrick Sharpe
Lyrics and music by J. Patrick Sharpe
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Dad we called you here today because we care
Don’t you think it’s time you did something about your hair?
It’s obvious that you got nothing on top
Dad this madness has got to stop
So we brought this barber with us—his name is Bob
All your friends and family are gathered here
‘Cause you can’t keep parting your hair just above your ear
You know you really look like a creep
When you do that hair gel sweep
Dad, you’re embarrassing us and plus you kind of look like a slob
Every time you get out of the swimming pool
Everybody turns around to stare
It’s like watching a really bad train wreck
Please let Bob cut your hair
Now this is the part where we lock the door
Come on Dad don’t make us have to pin you down on the floor
Please don’t struggle so much
They say that Bob over here has a real nice touch
He says you only have a few strands of hair it’s not a really hard job
Every time you get up in the morning
Your hair sticks up there all on one side
Don’t you know you’re only fooling yourself Dad?
We all know what you’re trying to hide
Please let Bob cut your hair
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