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I saw the struggles
I saw the fights
The heated arguments
Who was wrong and who was right?
Positions were taken
Lines were drawn
Every point was argued
No one ever backed down
Each day you pushed me
to take sides
Was I with you or against you
Was I brave or would I hide?
I tried to walk on water
and I tried to raise the dead
You knew you needed miracles
But you looked to me instead
You tried to make me choose
I was a child, I was afraid
I couldn’t walk on water
I couldn’t raise the dead
I knew the story
Heard behind closed doors
the screams and then the silence
like so many nights before
Huddled tight and safe
In the space beside my bed
I blocked out all the shouting
With little arms around my head
Each day you pushed me
to take sides
Was I with you or against you
Was I brave or would I hide?
I tried to walk on water
and I tried to raise the dead
You knew you needed miracles
But you looked to me instead
You tried to make me choose
I was a child, I was afraid
I couldn’t walk on water
I couldn’t raise the dead
They pretended that it was normal
The calm and then the storm
The tears and retributions
The promise of no more
The desperate “I love you”s
The pleading not to leave
And I clung to what I knew
If I ignore it, it’s not real
I tried to walk on water
and I tried to raise the dead
You knew you needed miracles
But you looked to me instead
You tried to make me choose
I was a child, I was afraid
I couldn’t walk on water
I couldn’t raise the dead
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