"A tongue in cheek reply to being constantly told that "you have problems, and these problems must be dealt with." I don't think he really has any intention of changing".
Written, performed a recorded by Jeffrey Schollar
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Babe, I want you to change me :P
Chorus:
Babe, I want you to change me,
because I don’t want to see you down.
I’ll be your Mummy’s boy; I’ll be your Daddy’s girl,
but hurry up and change me now.
Verse 1
Take me out, dress me up bright.
Teach me how to tie my shoes up tight.
Take me out shopping and buy me new clothes.
And be sure to tell me off when I’m picking my nose.
Verse 2
Pull me up for talking when my mouth is full.
I’ve always wanted to learn my nine times tables.
Teach me about history, and how to appreciate cheese.
And to cover my mouth whenever I sneeze.
Verse 3
Teach me how to write a good song from my heart.
To be polite at dinner parties, and not eat the last tart.
Tell me off for calling a midget an elf,
And for eating whole boxes of Shapes to myself.
Chucking in for dinner with Monopoly Money
And giving scratched Scratchies for Birthday presents’ not funny
And insisting on opening people presents for them
Is no act of courtesy, it’s just annoying
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